found online by Raymond
From The Life and Times of Bruce Gerencser:
I am often asked if I still fear going to Hell when I die. I suspect every Evangelical-Christian-turned-atheist, has had, at one time or the other, thoughts about what happens if they are wrong. If Evangelicals are right about God, Jesus, sin, salvation, and life after death, those of us who have — with full knowledge of what the Bible says — walked or run away from Christianity will surely face the eternal flames of Hell. This is where Pascal’s Wager often comes into play. Since none of us can be absolutely certain that Christianity’s teaching are false, shouldn’t we hedge our bets and accept Jesus as Lord and Savior?
Fortunately, I didn’t walk away from Christianity with a persistent fear of Hell, but that’s because it wasn’t instilled in me. The churches in my area didn’t preach hellfire and damnation and I was too well-behaved as a child for my parents to ever be able to threaten me with it. They probably thought that Hell is for “other people” anyway. Amusingly, once they found out that I’m an atheist, they began to look for theological justifications for believing that I would still join them in Heaven. I believe that they settled on the “once saved, always saved” doctrine.
But I did lose something, even if it’s not common to all Christians: certainty in metaphysics, morality, a divine plan, life after death, purpose, being one of the “good guys,” etc. and the comfort that goes along with it. It was pleasant to live without doubt regarding so many important things. I see all of that as error now, but I can’t help but feel a now unfillable hole where these things used to be. And while some people seem to be able to cope with that problem (if not avoid it altogether) by finding purpose in their careers or hobbies, beauty and wonder in nature, and belonging in their communities, nothing really works for me. I just try to not think about it.
It is my understanding that God is love. Fear is not His tool. Fear, lies, and hate are tools of the Enemy. Instilling that kind of fear, particularly in children, of Hell and damnation seems cruel and contrary to true Christian doctrine to me.
Ryan, I honestly and sincerely hurt for you, sir. St. Augustine is credited with the saying, “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in you.” I realize that this is fairy tales and unicorns to you, Ryan, but that is the second thought that came to mind after reading your comment.
By the way, “once saved, always saved” is a Protestant creation. Biblically and in the history of Christianity, this “doctrine” did not exist until after Martin Luther and the Protestant reformation in the 16th Century. Catholicism teaches that you must “endure to the end”. In other words, you can indeed lose your salvation and be cut off from God’s grace, hence the reason for the sacrament of reconciliation (confession). Christ gave his apostles this charism. “Who’s sins you forgive are forgiven and who’s sins you retain are retained.” Further, lest my Protestant friends protest this, in the sacrament of reconciliation, the priest acts “in persona Christi”, or in the person of Christ. In other words, it isn’t the priest, but Christ through the priest that forgives or retains any mortal sins that would separate us from God’s saving grace. God knows that our sinful concupiscence will often lead us astray from Him, thus in His love, He provided a way to regain His grace and our salvation through this beautiful sacrament.
As for justifying the existence of God, have you ever read Thomas Aquinas’ “Summa Theologica”?
It is far more penetrating than the literalist Evangelical justifications for the existence of God today. I certainly don’t expect it would change your mind, but at least it would give a far more scholarly look into the truth of the matter. Food for thought, anyway…
Cheers!
Yes, my parents are Protestants. My mother was raised by a Southern Baptist minister. I am not sure about my father, though I recall him mentioning charismatic elements of at least one of his old churches. Now, as has been the case for at least two decades, they grudgingly attend a non-denominational church because they have found nothing better (i.e. more blatantly conservative) in their area.
The problem with that St. Augustine quote is that many people seem quite content without Christianity or even without any religion at all, including those who were once religious and therefore know what they gave up. My own problems almost certainly have more to do with my personality (I struggle to find motivation, for example, because I have so little passion and so few interests) than with losing religion, but they wouldn’t be as pronounced if I hadn’t been raised with some of those beliefs about how the world is or is supposed to be and my place in it. You can find similar experiences among those who left other religions and, I suspect, those who were raised to believe non-religious versions of “everything happens for a reason” and “everyone has a purpose” before embracing a more existential perspective. Some people just adapt better than others.
I have not actually read Summa Theologica, but I am familiar with most arguments for God’s existence, including Aquinas’ “proofs” from motion, efficient cause, necessity, perfection, and design. Like other atheists, I find them all lacking, particularly with regard to proving the existence of his particular god. Accepting them would have little to no impact on my life without all of the other details that make up religions, all of which need to be justified on their own.