found online by Raymond
From The Onion:
PALO ALTO, CA—Doubling down on a recent controversial statement he made about a British cave diver who helped free a youth soccer team from a cave in Thailand, Tesla CEO Elon Musk reportedly insisted Monday that he would be a much more innovative pedophile than rescue worker Vernon Unsworth. “Look, the only insulting thing I was trying to say when I called that guy a pedo was that he represents a laughably simplistic, outdated form of child molesting that is badly in need of disruption from Silicon Valley leaders like myself…”